Gary Johnson Forced to Bake Trump’s Inauguration Cake

With Donald Trump’s inauguration just two days away, preparations for the big event have almost reached their conclusion. DC staffers thought they were all finished until Donald Trump exclaimed that no one baked a cake.

Hundreds of bakeries were contacted to fulfill the simple request, but all refused out of fear that their stores would be boycotted by angry leftists. After realizing that no one was going to bake them a cake, the Trump transition team ventured up into the mountains of Aleppo to locate the Cake Boss, Gary Johnson.

But to their dismay, Johnson was not up to the task. “Look, Donald Trump is a RACIST, and his use of the term ‘illegal immigrant’ is incendiary to our Mexican population. I will not bake the cake.”

The Trump transition team responded to Johnson’s remarks by playing him clips from the Libertarian Party presidential debate a year ago, where Johnson argued that a baker should be forced to make a Nazi wedding cake.

With a confused look on his face, Johnson’s head whipped left and right as he pondered what to say. But before he could get a word out, the Trump transition team pulled up Johnson’s interview with the Washington Examiner, in which Johnson was asked if it’s the federal government’s job to prevent discrimination in all cases and answered “Yes, yes, in all cases. Yes.”

Still, Johnson maintained that he did not want to bake Donald Trump a cake. But the Trump transition team wasn’t going to take no as an answer by a man who believes bakers should not be allowed to discriminate. Gary Johnson then proceeded to bake Donald Trump’s inauguration cake on an Easy Bake Oven, and the cake is now on its way from Aleppo to Washington DC.

President-elect Trump spoke with Fox News’ Tucker Carlson about the situation. “No one wanted to make a cake. It was so sad, folks. So we reached out to Gary Johnson. He makes the best cakes. Believe me. He didn’t want to bake the cake, so we made him bake it. And we will make Mexico pay for that wall.”